Two Keys to Avoiding Adolescent Morning Meltdowns

Introduction:

Mornings can be hard for anyone of any age, but especially for families with adolescents. Now that school is back in session, it’s time for the morning rush out of the door, which can cause a lot of stress for both the teen and caregiver. But with a few changes, mornings can become easeful and stress-free. Are you a caring adult looking to upgrade your morning experience with your adolescent? Try these two key strategies and see if they help move the needle.

1. Establish Routines

Routines are incredibly important for children and adolescents. The predictability and stability of routines help young people feel confident and secure. School can be stress-producing for students and parents alike. According to researchers, “Engaging, predictable environments and ongoing positive adult-child interactions are necessary for promoting children’s social and emotional development and preventing challenging behaviors” (Hemmer, Ostrosky, and Fox, 2006). Here are examples of routines you can try with your tweens and teens:

Bedtime Prep Routine:

Simple tasks that prepare the adolescent for the next day and make the morning smoother.

1. backpack packed night before
2. clothes out night before
3. lunch packed
4. set alarm
5. pre-select breakfast

Morning Routine with Incentive Structure:

Easy morning tasks — complete every weekday morning for a small treat/reward at the end of the week.

1. make bed
2. pajamas in hamper
3. wash face, brush teeth, brush hair
4. eat breakfast/clean up
5. bring lunch

• Prioritize 1:1 Connection Before School

School can be a stressful experience that starts before your child enters the classroom. In addition to establishing routines that develop security and confidence in your kid, it is important to carve out time for one-on-one connection, preferably before the business of the school day begins. This individualized time helps facilitate secure attachment; shows the adolescent that you are important to them – and that their feelings and experiences matter to you. This connection can look like a daily connection as they wake up, on the ride to school, or at home before breakfast.

Sample questions:

What are you grateful for today?

What are you looking forward to today?

What is going to be the hardest part of your day? How will you deal with it?

For more resources on connecting with the adolescents in your life, check out this blog on conversation starters.

Are you a caring adult that wants to learn how to make a difference in the lives of adolescents and young adults? Youth life coaching may be for you. Learn more about our programs and trainings here.